Pillow to the Face

Miriam: Thank you to you, Mr. B and Mr. B's crack for re-inflating Bubble Time.

I will also try to teach a life lesson. That lesson is: Don't ever be the first person to fall asleep at a sleepover. And don't be the second person to fall asleep at a sleepover either. And most certainly not the third.

I learned this lesson the hard way. Megan was having a sleepover for her birthday. She invited all of the girls in the 3rd grade class at St. Monica's over to her house, which meant about 10 people. Small school. In this small school, I played the part of the shy bookworm (think Baby-sitter's Club, not Kafka) who could spend an entire religion class deciding whether to use the purple crayon or the blue crayon to color St. Francis' robes. I never liked sleepovers because they were a sham: They claimed to bring sleep, but all they really brought were hours of idle chatter, hard floors and face-licking dogs that would trample you and your sleeping bag. Now, don't get me wrong; I loved a good game of "Light as a Feather/Stiff as a Board" as much as the next person. I just would've preferred to play it at my house and then wish everyone a goodnight as I scurried off to my own bed.

But I went to Megan's, and for the most part, it was fun. We ate pizza, played games and talked about the two biggest studs in the 3rd grade - Brian and Michael. During our round of Truth or Dare, Meredith, one of the girls in the circle of sleeping bags, fell asleep. Someone decided to play a prank on her, so Megan grabbed a tube of toothpaste from her bathroom and squirted a giant blob into Meredith's hand. Meredith rolled over and got it in her hair. We all laughed. I laughed. Tricia fell asleep next. She got shaving cream in her hand. We laughed again. Then shortly after, I fell asleep.

I was half conscious and tucked into my sleeping bag with my back to the floor when I heard voices. Something had startled me awake, but I was too tired to open my eyes to see what it was. "Do it again!" said one voice.
"No, you do it this time," whispered another.
I thought I was dreaming, and I must've shifted in my sleeping bag.
"Guys, she's waking up!" hissed another voice. "DO IT NOW!"
I felt a woosh of air above my head, and I cracked my eye. The only thing I could see without my glasses on in the pitch-black room was something coming toward my face that seemed to move in slow motion. The second it hit, I passed out.

When I woke up the next morning, Meredith was trying to wash the toothpaste out of her hair. Tricia was complaining about the shaving cream on her pillow. I felt groggy. I told everyone about the weird dream I had about something hitting me in the face. Erin, Helene and all of the other stay-awakers giggled. "You were awake??" said Megan.
"Yeah, why?" I asked.
"We totally hit you with pillows!!!" Megan said. "We thought you were asleep!!!"

So, let this be a lesson to you all: In the order of sleepover pranks, it goes toothpaste, shaving cream and then a pillow to the face. Choose your timing wisely.